I will be the first to admit that I am far (VERY far) from perfect. I don't have it all figured out. I make mistakes. A lot of them. However, I do try to learn from them. Not just for myself, but for you. Anyone that gives advice, and pretends to know the answer to every question all of the time is full of it. Take this week for example. Less than a week after going on TV to talk about how you shouldn't use the holidays to reconnect with an ex, I committed the sin I preached about. I sent a fake "wrong message". You know, like a fake butt dial? "Oops! I didn't mean to send that, but now that I have you, how are you?" Terrible. I know. We broke up for a reason. Good ones. The intellectual side of my brain knows that. The intellectual side knows that long-term compatibility isn't there and that there were too many issues to overcome. The emotional side of my brain said "You miss him! What if there is still a chance? We can change together!" The truth is somewhere in the middle. Yes, I missed him, but we aren't meant to be. Thankfully, my good sense recovered and took over after that initial message. I stopped writing and distracted myself with a great book before I really started letting my emotions take over. I wish I could blame it on eggnog.
The point of sharing my personal story? I get it. I feel you over the holidays when you want to have that companionship. You want to have someone to go to those terrible ugly sweater parties with. You want to worry about whether you bought them too much, or too little as a gift. You want someone to keep you warm when the global warming that has hit NYC this week fades.
You will have it.
You will have all that and more.
My wish for you this holiday season is unbelievable heart pounding crazy love. Keep the faith, it is out there, and the next time you think about reaching out to an ex? Take my lesson to heart. Some doors have to remain closed to allow for another to open. Find a way to distract yourself with something that keeps your mind and heart from wandering. For some it is exercising, others find solace in bad television (me! me!). Anything that keeps you from (re)opening that door.
Wishing you much love and happiness to all of you in 2014! You deserve it.