Posts tagged fearless
Fear sucks.
images-1.jpg

You would think I would have the market cornered on getting past my fears. I wrote a book on being fearless. I gave a TED talk on killing fear. I do things every day that scare me. You would think I'd be immune! Or at least less effected. I wish.

I'm in a beautiful relationship with an amazing man, and there are times that I am terrified. WHAT?! How is that even possible? Doesn't love remove all fear? Isn't it the magic bullet that makes everything perfect?

Loving someone and allowing yourself to be loved can be the scariest thing you'll ever do. The vulnerability it takes to love is unbelievably frightening. What if I get hurt? What if they leave? Oh the possibilities of pain and heartbreak...it makes you wonder why we all seek this!

Then I remember why. Because there is nothing more beautiful than being with someone who gets you. Because life is so much brighter when you have someone to share it with. Because there is no greater gift in this world than to feel love for another, and feel loved in return.

I acknowledge my fear, but I don't let it control me. I understand that my past, my insecurities, and my lack of control are scary when it comes to being vulnerable and loving. And I do it anyway.

Overcoming your fears takes practice, whether its a fear of putting yourself out there, taking chances, or loving fully. We all have a choice. We can run and hide, or face our fears head on, and have the possibility of amazing love and an amazing life.

Acknowledge, accept, and overcome.

Why Vulnerability is HOT

“We cultivate love when we allow our most vulnerable and powerful selves to be deeply seen and known, and when we honor the spiritual connection that grows from that offering with trust, respect, kindness, and affection." ― Brené Brown I recently spent time with a guy friend of mine. Someone that I have had a connection with for quite a while. He is awesome. Cracks me up, keeps me on my toes (ie. calls me out on my BS), and is easy on the eyes. There is absolutely chemistry. My friend has made it clear in the past that he is interested, and as much as I like him and am attracted to him, I could never be in a relationship with him. Why you ask? Because of the massive wall around his heart. He is afraid to tell people how he feels. He thinks pretending not to care is a safer path. Sure I could try to be "that girl" that breaks it down, but at what cost? Have you ever been in a relationship where one person is open, fearless, and ready, while the other is closed, guarded, and scared of hurt? It doesn't usually work.

There is power in vulnerability. There is LOVE in vulnerability. Taking the risk to show your heart to someone is terrifying, but the reward is unbelievably amazing. Vulnerability is HOT.

You see, for all of his great qualities, my friend is missing one of the most important things necessary to make a real, loving, relationship work. If you can't let your guard down, stop playing games, and let yourself (your REAL self) be seen, you can never experience love the way it was meant to be. Honest, open, secure, and healthy.

My plea to you? Be vulnerable. Allow yourself to feel every emotion, and find someone prepared to protect your heart when you place it in their hands.